November 24

Coffee with Mike- Does Winning Require a Loser?



Does someone- if you have to win, does someone else always have to lose? Does there really have to be a loser in a transaction with you? That's really the thing, right? So, I just notice that a lot, you know, that it's hard to miss in the politics of today, it's hard to miss in the economy of today, that it seems like that we're always thinking about winning and losing, and we don't want to lose. We want to win, therefore someone else has to lose. I think it's not a good thing for us to be so competitive that we think of ourselves as competitors first. Being a competitor is important. Being able to give your all is important. Being able to be the best at what you do is important. But wanting to have someone else lose isn't necessarily important. 

So what I think what I'm thinking about here is why is it that we're so competitive that we feel like we have to win, and therefore someone else has to lose. I look at that happening on the street, you know. When we get under our cars and we go up to a light, and it's like we're all revving our engines, we're waiting for the checkered flag to fall or whatever kind of flag- I guess it's the green flag to fall- and everyone goes off on the race. Here we go, let's see who gets to the like the next light first, and then who can get ahead of who, you know, who can get to the merge lane first.

I see that happening. In our town, we've got a merge lane, and that merge lane is actually supposed to be a turn lane into all the restaurants and the different shops that you can go into. So that lane naturally is supposed to be slower. They have their choice to be able to turn and get back, and someone else to turn out of there to get into our lane. That's supposed to be something that everyone can get in and out of easily. It's turned into a real competitive thing that we got this other lane next to it that eventually merges into this lane that everyones turning in and out of. That becomes a race to the merge point! So I just find that to be unhelpful. I find that to be unenjoyable and I want a better journey, I just want to enjoy the journey a little bit more.

So what I thought what I thought of is, "I'm a financial planner, I'm trying to help people figure out how to get from here to there." So really what I'm helping people do is plan a journey. Not just arrive at a destination, not just be able to say, "oh, I got to retirement", but to be able to have enjoyed getting to retirement. Being able to have enjoyed meeting the people they've met, doing the things they've done, and helping their fellow man along the way. I just wanted to talk about that. 

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